More Wierdo Stuff

 Wow!  I can't believe Mom let a whole month go by without posting in the blog.  She's been doing stupid stuff like making new curtains and moving furniture around.  Did you know she got rid of my big red couch and chair?

That was my Christmas picture chair.  Remember?  Well maybe you don't.  But I spent many a night on that red couch and chair.  How could she?  Without even asking me!  She says as soon as they deliver the new chair for the TV room, I can have the big leather chair all to myself.  I can't wait!

Anyway, where was I?  Oh, yes, the subject of this post.  I thought I should continue with the weird things my humans think that I do.

This week, we'll focus on my Javelina Fetish (as Mom calls it).  

When we take a walk, I am always always always on the lookout (no, that's the wrong word -- 'cuz it's the smell that I look out for and I really can't look for a smell, cuz I can't see a smell.    So maybe the word is smell-out?)  I'm always on the smell-out for the odor of javelinas.  In case you don't know, javelinas smell really really really bad.  So it's easy to smell where they've been for the last week or so.  

Yesterday, we went out and Mom was angry because there was a big hole next to one of our cactuses.  (No, cacti.  Or is it a girl cactus and it's cactae?  Whatever.)  With our really pretty agave cactus, we had to put big ol' rocks all around it so the javelinas wouldn't dig in and eat up the roots.  You remember when they ate the whole plant in my neighbors garden?  And then when they replanted it, the javelinas came back and ate the new plant.  Now there is a big ol' rock there and no plants.  Hee, hee.  That'll show those hungry javelinas!

Anyway, I just love to hunt javelinas.  I can tell when they've been around.  Mom says she can tell when I have a javelina smell up my nose.  She says I get tense and stare out at the last place I saw a javelina as if they might appear again right there!  Well, they might!

Last evening, we went to the mailbox and right after we passed the wash (that's a bunch of dirt and old wood and dead cactus that let's the water go through so it doesn't flood our houses.)  Know how many times there has been water in our wash?  Uno!  In eleven years.  But when it did get full it was scary.  It came all of a sudden and the whole wash was full.  I'm glad no animals were in the wash at the time, cuz they would have been smooshed!  

Uh, oh.  I forgot what my point was.  Was it washes?  No, it was when we passed the wash and all of a sudden I stopped short because there was Mama Javelina and she stopped 6 inches from my nose.  She froze.  I froze.  Mom froze.  Then we all started running in opposite directions.  ('cept I was attached to a leash, so I had to quick turn and run with Mom.)  Right after that, Daddy Javelina showed up with the little ones and they all ran off into the wash.  It was a little scary and Mom made us go home without the mail. 

But I wish we could have stayed and tried to make friends with the Javelina family.  I think we could get along pretty well.

But the next day, we saw Mama Javelina and the kids on the porch of one of our neighbors.

 I stopped quick to see if Mom would let us go say hello.  But she made me stay put and she got to get a picture of her.  How come Mom gets to take pictures, but I don't get to play with them.  

One day, I'm going to be off my leash when we see a javelina and I'm going to go right over and say hello and see if they want to play with me.  But until then, I keep sniffing the ground where they've been and Mom and Dad just laugh at me.  Just wait!

Hope people don't think you are a weirdo just because you want to make friends with someone who is not just like you and who might just be a little bit scary.

Love, G

Am I Weird or Is It Them?

 Mom and Dad think I do strange things.  Lots and lots and lots of strange things.  But I don't think they're so strange.  I think they are absolutely positively normal.

I'm just going to give you a few of the things in this post.  (In case you think they're strange, too, I wouldn't want you to get the opinion that I am a complete weirdo - so I think I'll save a few for later, OK?)

Anyway, the first thing they always tell people about is this:  Guinness doesn't go to the bathroom in his own backyard.  

That's right.  I don't!  In fact, I make it a habit not to do anything until we are at least two houses past my own.  Even if it's raining out and we have to walk all the way to the Green Spots in the rain.  Well, I don't like the rain either so sometimes I make Mom put us in the car to take me to a Green Spot.  Even then, I might not get out of the car right away.  She has had to drag me out!

And sometimes if they get home late, they still have to take me out.  Cuz, I can hold it a really really really long time, but I do have my limits.  So if it's late and dark out, Mom and Dad take me out together.  Mom brings a flashlight and shines it around in case there are javelinas, or coyotes or bobcats.  I don't think the snakes are out at night.  At least we haven't  seen any yet.  And sometimes if its really really really dark, we'll all go in the car to the Green Spot where they can park the car facing the grass and turn on the headlights.  Then I get to go with the headlights directly on me -- just like if I was in the movies!

And in the summer when you can fry an egg on the sidewalk, it isn't fun to walk to the Green Spots.  It burns my feet.  Mom goes out in front of the house and stands with her bare feet on the asphalt to see if it's too hot for me.  (Now who is being really really really weird?)  If it is too hot we use the car.  Or if Dad has the car, I get to wear those fun Booties.  Remember the Booties?  

OK, once I did go out in the backyard.  That was when I was feeling really really really bad and it was in the middle of the night.  I stared at Mom (like I do when I want her to do something) and she woke up and knew right away what I needed.  

This is me telling Mom what I want her to do!

You'd understand that look wouldn't you?

So she let me out and I did a gooey number.  But I felt a lot better after that.  But that was the only time.

Well, not really.  I confess when my friend Sutter was here, he went out in the back yard.  I wasn't going to let him pee and poop in my back yard if I didn't.  So I did.  But when he left I stopped.

Here's why I think I'm being perfectly normal.  Dogs do not like to mess in their homes.  That's why you're supposed to potty train a dog by using a crate.  Then they don't mess in their crate and they wait till you take them out where they are supposed to go.  

I'm have a very expansive view of the world.  The whole house and yard are my home.  I won't mess any where near my home.  Is that so weird?  No.  It's just me.  So live with it!

Well, actually, they have lived with it for almost 9 years.  So I'm not complaining.  They can laugh at me for being weird and I'll just laugh back at them.

So maybe that's enough weirdness for one blog.

Hope your weirdness is a lovable one, too!

Love, G

Here Comes Santa Claus!

Mom took me for a walk in the dark.  We NEVER walk in the dark (except to do YouKnowWhat after I've had dinner because YouKnowWho won't do YouKnowWhat in our back yard).  But other than that, we don't walk in the dark.  Cuz, well, javalinas and rattle snakes and coyotes and bob cats.  That's why.

So I was surprised the other night when she drove up to the Rec Center and then told me to get out in the dark. She started singing "Here come Santa Claus, Right down Santa Claus lane!"  (Believe me, you don't want to hear Mom sing!  But that's not the point.  At least I don't think so.  No, the point was she was singing about Santa Claus Lane.  And what do you know?  There we were on Santa Claus Lane!

Santa had a list of all the good boys and girls and dogs and cats.  Mom said my name was on it!  I didn't see it, but I'll take her word for it.  Why wouldn't it be?  I'm such a good dog!

We stopped in front of my friend Pooh Bear!  He's my favorite bear.  Actually, he might be the only bear I know.  Whatever.  I like Pooh Bear! 

We kept going down Santa Claus Lane. 

We saw presents and sparkly snow on the trees, just like at my cousin's house in Massachusetts!  Where I've never been, but I know about snow cuz I met it in St. Louis once.  It's cold.  The snow on these trees wasn't so cold, but it was pretty.

I tried to pretend I was a wolf howling at the Christmas moon...

It was all so pretty.  But my favorite part...except for Pooh Bear.  I really really really like Pooh Bear...Did you know that?  ...my favorite part was at the end.  That's where we got to wish everybody, Happy Holidays!  

And so from Santa Claus Lane and My House, to you:  Happy Holidays.

Love from G

(And from Mom and Dad, too)

I have a new cousin!

I haven't met my new cousin yet, but I saw a picture and she sure is a cutie!

Oh, no!  That's not my new cousin!  That's Javelina!  She was watching Mom and Dad play golf last Sunday.  She's fun but I don't think I'd call her a cutie.  Wait, let me find the right picture.

There she is!  Her name is Vicki.  She's named after my Grandmother.  She doesn't really look like my Grandmother.  My Grandmother was pretty.  This Vickie is just a cutie.  Don't you think?

Maybe someday I'll get to meet her.  Mom says we need to get the airlines to let pups like me fly with my parents.  Little dogs get to fly, but us big dogs have to go in cargo, and she says I wouldn't like it.  I think it's more that SHE wouldn't like it.  She likes me to travel close to her.  I don't think she likes to travel by herself.  That's why she takes Dad with her when I can't go.  Maybe we can start a petition to let big dogs fly in airplanes with the people.  Would you sign my petition?  I really want to go and see my new cousin.  Actually, I would like to go and see my old cousins too.  I've only met, let me see, my cousin Zach, and my cousin Frosty, and my cousin Kyle, and Meagan and Kelly.  I think I have a lot more cousins.  Cousins are neat.  I would like to fly and see the rest of my cousins.  I have an Uncle who flies planes for American Airlines.  Maybe he can get American Airlines to let me go see my cousins!

That can be our goal for next year.  All of us can work together to get American Airlines to let big dogs like me fly in the plane with our humans.  OK?

Anyway, my cousin Vicki, sent me another picture.  And it made me think of Christmas.

I guess I'd better start thinking about my Christmas blog.  It's coming up soon.  And I've been very good so Santa Claus will bring me good presents.  I'd better tell Vicki she needs to put the fire out so Santa can come and give her presents too.  It's tough being an older cousin, but I like being able to tell her about life!

Hope you have cousins you can talk to, too.

Love, G

Voted Off the Island - AGAIN!

I screwed up.  Yes, again.  Mom took me to the Dog Park.  We haven't been there in a long long long time.  But Dad was playing golf and so we went.

It was good to be back.  I sometimes am a little shy when I get there, but usually I find a pup that will play with me.  Like Shawn.  Shawn is one pretty pup.

 We spent some time getting to know each other.

I let Shawn know that I was really interested.  In playing together!!  What were you thinking?...I don't even know if Shawn is a girl or a guy.  I don't much care; I'm neutered anyway.

I'm pretty sure Shawn was interested, too.  Unfortunately, this is the last of the pictures, 'cuz then I tried to h**p Shawn and Mom didn't like it.  Neither did Shawn's Mom -- she said, Shawn doesn't like that!"  Which is how I know Shawn doesn't like that.  I'm not sure Shawn didn't like it, but Shawn's Mom didn't like it, so Mom grabbed my leash and off we went.

That was OK, though.  Cuz we went to breakfast at the General Store.  Which is another something we haven't done in a long long long long time.  And I really like breakfast at the General Store, 'cuz, well BACON!!

Hope you have lots of friends to play with and lots of BACON.  

Love, G

On the Road Again!

We took ANOTHER trip!  Dad's trying to make up for all the trips he didn't take last year, and I get the benefit.  That's 'cuz he only wants to travel in the U.S. until the COVID stuff goes away and I get to go with them.

So we got in the car and travelled up to Sedona for a few days.  It was lovely.  

They have a GREAT dog park.  It does have a plastic swimming pool but Mom wouldn't let me get in it 'cuz the water was really really really muddy.  I tried, but she pulled me out.  She said it was pretty ironic (I KNOW what that means, it means why would I get into a plastic swimming pool full of mucky water in the dog park when I won't get into the plastic swimming pool she fills for me with cool clean water at my house?)

I met a really cute friend at the park.  She showed us how we could go behind the main park and there was a whole 'nother part of the park that went way up a mountain (well maybe not a mountain), but it had lots of trails and I could run with my new friend and Mom couldn't see me.  She wasn't worried, though, cuz it wasn't a very big area and she spotted us soon.  I tried to pretend that my new friend and I had some "fun" when she wasn't looking, but she didn't believe me because, well, you know, I can't!  We had fun anyway.

 There was a beautiful trail near the dog park and the three of us hiked up it.  There was a lot of red dirt around.  Something tells me there's a bath in my future when we get home.  Better enjoy this while I can. 

We went out to eat at a neat restaurant called Creekside, because it was...creekside, that is.

But the wierdest thing we did was a jeep tour.  I've never been in a jeep.  I didn't know what to expect.  It started out OK.  I got to sit on a cushioned seat next to Mom.

 But once we got started, I had to get down on the seat.  Mom even tried to strap me in with seat belts, but she ended up just holding on to me.

We went on some pretty bumpy roads.  Lots of pretty sights, but mostly I was trying  not to fall out of the jeep.  When we finally got back, I posed with the jeep cowboy.

Then I got a drink of water, got in our car, and threw up in the back seat.  (Mom's glad we have a washable seat cover in the back.)

I slept really really really good that night!

Hope you have some wierd and wonderful trips (but don't get sick).

Love, G

The Bestest Part of the Colorado Trip

 So I have one more story for you about our Colorado trip.  Dad got bored in Boulder.  I don't know why.  We had that big, beautiful dog park with a lake to walk around.  We could Eat in the Buff whenever we wanted to.  And we could play "Open Says-a-me" with the doors in the hotel.  What more could he want?  But he decided we were going to Vail.  To the Grand Hyatt.

That sounded pretty good to me, too.  I like Grand stuff.  And boy, was it!

As soon as we got to the front door, I hopped out.  There must have been at least 3 people in funny uniforms who ran up with treats for me and lots of petting.  I was in heaven.  They must have known I was coming and got all this ready, just for me.  Dad didn't tell me he had planned all this just for me.  He's a great Dad.

Later we went for dinner, but it was raining.  This Hyatt place said I could sit inside in the Fireside Lounge with Mom and Dad and have dinner there.  I didn't have to go out somewhere.  I could be just like everybody else!  It was great.  And the waitress was all over me just like the people at the front door.  She even took a picture of us.

I don't usually let Mom and Dad get in my blog pictures.  But there wasn't much I could do about it.

In the morning we had breakfast on the deck overlooking a bubbling brook.  

And then, Mom took me down to the brook and I got to play in the water.  It was just my kind of water.  Only 6" deep!

Later I got to ride a bus into town and we walked all over.  We even found a store that my cousin, Meagan used to work at.  Only hers was in New York City.  It was something to do with Pianos and something else.  (I told Mom to crop dad out of the picture, cuz he had been in too many of my pictures this blog.  But she said it wouldn't work, cuz then no one could see the name of the store.  So I guess he can be in 3 pictures.  As long as I get to be in more than him.)

We left for Arizona soon after that.  It was a great vacation from the 115 degree heat, but I was ready to get back to my own bed and my own back yard.  

And already, Dad is thinking about the next place to go.

Will you look at that?  Mom snuck Dad into another picture.  She and I are going to have a talk.

Hope you get your own blog with your own pictures!

Love, G