Mom Bought Me a Bathtub!

It's been pretty hot around here lately.  Got up to 115 degrees the other day.  Even my friends the bunny rabbits are making holes to hide in.

He really buried himself deep in there.  It made Mom think that she should buy me a swimming pool.  So she did.

Well, SHE said it was a swimming pool.  But I know what a swimming pool looks like.  We had a swimming pool back in Clayton when we lived there.  I showed you pictures of that.  Remember?

That was my friend Sophie with me.  This pool is shaped like my doggie biscuits and has lots of doggies to play with.

Mom went and bought me this thing:

 She threw a ball in it to make it look like it was fun.  Heck, SHE even went in it.  But I know better.  This is just a ruse to get me in it and then she's gonna give me a bath.  NOT DOIN' IT!

SHE can go sit in it if she wants to, but I'm not taking a bath in it.  NO WAY!  I don't care how hot it is.  Maybe if another doggie came and got in it with me, then I'd know that Mom wasn't trying to give me a bath.  But until then.....

Anyway, hope you get a real swimming pool and not a bathtub if you're in hot weather, too!

Love, G

Got my fill of NUMBERS this week!

It's been a while since I've been able to help Mom with her accounting stuff.  She's mostly been doing it on her own without my help.  But last week, Dad left some money on his dresser, so I thought I would count it for him in case he needed to know how much he had.

Unfortunately, the bills sort of came apart in my mouth.  

But notice how well I succeeded in saving the serial numbers.  That's so when Mom goes to replace the bills at the bank, she can get new ones with no problem.  She says they laugh at her at the bank.  I don't know why.  Counting money is not funny business, is it?

You might wonder why I didn't just eat the whole bunch of numbers.  But I did better than that yesterday.  This time I came across a long, long list of numbers in green, red and black.  There were tons and tons of numbers on this card.  So I ate the whole thing.  This is all Mom found of it. 

I guess if I had eaten the last bite, she might never have known that I ate her Mah Jongg card.  That's what she said it was.  She wasn't all that mad, because she said she had copied it and it wasn't the real thing.  I have a feeling, life might have been a bit nastier if I had eaten the real thing!

The problem is, while I love to get my fill of numbers, I haven't been feeling all that good lately.  I didn't eat breakfast until 4:00 this afternoon.  Maybe I'll swear off numbers for a while again.  My inner Guru says it might be a good idea.

Hope you get your fill of numbers, too.

Love, G

We've been invaded!

The other day, we were getting ready to walk up to the grocery store.  (Mom forgot to get orange juice again!)  Just before we left out the front door, we all heard a big BANG.  It sounded like something hit the side of a wall.  But we didn't see anything.

That is, until we got to the road leading to the grocery store.  Then we saw them.  A Mama Javelina and a baby were right next to our west wall.  It looked like they were trying to dig a hole to snuggle in.  (In our part of the world, they snuggle into deep holes to keep cool.  Where I used to live, we snuggled together to stay warm.  It's a funny world.)  They must have bumped the wall making the huge BANG.

Anyway, we saw the two of them trying to make a home in our yard. 

Mom got some good pictures before Dad decided he didn't want them making a home in our yard.  He picked up a stone to throw towards them.  He said he wasn't going to hurt them, just scare them away.

But I wouldn't let him do that.  And probably not for the reason you're thinking.  (Yes I'm a very caring puppy, but there was another very good reason for him not to do it.)

I barked to get his attention, and Mom saw what I saw.  Right near the cross street was Papa Javelina with two babies and a teenager.  He was staring right at Dad.  I think he would have stormed the fort if Dad had thrown the stone.

Mom encouraged Dad to walk away slowly and we continued on to the grocery store.  She decided not to try to get pictures of Papa Javelina while he was so mad.  That's why I don't have any good pictures of him.  Mom wouldn't make a very good reporter.  Good reporters take more risks that that.

When we got back, they were all gone.  The only thing they left was a hole in the ground.  Oh, and a gnawed off root on one of the cacti.  (That's the plural for a cactus.  I tried cactuses, but it sounded funny, so I looked it up and it's really cacti.  Put that in your Dictionary!)

I haven't seen the javelinas since.  I hope they found someplace to stay cool.  It's pretty hot around here and they have very heavy coats.  (And rather large teeth!)

Hope your home doesn't get invaded by javelinas.  Or if it does, I hope they are the friendly kind.

Love, G

Now What?!

Do you remember I told you how hot it was on my tootsies?  And how Mom would drive me to a green spot so I could do my business?  Well, no more!

I have a new torture.  They bought me booties.  Little leather shoes.  To go on my feet.  (That's where booties go.)

It's supposed to protect my tender paws from the hot pavement.  What a racket.  Look at these things.  They have velcro wraps that go around my legs to keep them on.  How am I supposed to deal with these?

But Mom made me go out with them anyway.  

She says I prance like a show horse in them.  But heck, it's the only way I can move without tripping over my own feet.

But I can do the important stuff in them.

And actually, they aren't all that bad.  In fact they might actually look classy on me.

I think I'll go see if my friends down the street want to admire them.  (And maybe get me a few of their wonderful cookies.)

Oh, well.  Guess we better go back home.  Nobody's here today.

Oops, I threw a shoe!  They have to come off anyway, so no harm done.  I have to admit, I didn't feel the hot pavement as bad.  And I guess a little prancing never hurt anybody.  I think I kinda like my new booties.  I might keep 'em.

Hope you have neat booties that you like.

Love, G

Still Social Distancing

Did I tell you we've been walking more since we started this Social Distancing thing.  Mom and Dad are around a lot (when they're not playing golf).  But we take long walks in the early early morning, when its only 79 degrees out instead of 102!  

Yeah, it gets really hot here.  So hot, in fact that instead of letting me walk to a green space in the afternoon after they come home from golf, Mom puts me in a car and drives me to the green space, so I can do my business without burning my feet.  What?  You want to know why I can't just do my business in the back yard?  EXCUSE ME!  The back yard is part of my home and I don't want it to be stinky.  So no, I DO NOT do my business in the back yard.  When we lived in St. Louis, I didn't go in the back yard either.  If it snowed, then Mom or Dad had to put on their heavy coats and boots to take me out.  But no way was I going to do my business in the back yard.  So we drive to the bathroom.  Get over it!

So we have been walking more, and it's still hot at 79 degrees.  But I have a solution that works for me.  Especially when we go in the morning.  You see, the sprinklers are set to go off in the mornings.  I don't like to jump in a sprinkler, but I do like that the grass gets wet.  Then I jump in the grass and roll and roll and roll.

Trouble is, I sometimes end up like this:

Or this:

But it's all good.  Mom gets me untangled.  And I get cool and calm.

Hope you can get cool and calm, too.  (Unless you're living in St. Louis or the East Coast where I here it's not all that warm today!)

Love, G 

Post 2 Coronavirus

I know I owe you a new post.  But I've been so distracted after my film debut, that it has been hard to come back to earth among all the little people and resume my mundane life.  This morning, our neighbors asked me for my autograph and I had to refuse them, as I was not carrying a pen in my pocket.  In fact, I do not have a pocket in which to carry a pen.  So no autograph.

But back to why I have returned to my mundane life to continue my posts: I am a conscientious canine and will always do the responsible thing, so I am back to entertain my minions.

My Mom had her French book club today.  And while that may sound impressive, I am here to tell you otherwise.  I sat in on their phone conversation (because, of course with Covid 19 they couldn't visit each other, and anyway, two of them live in St. Louis, which would be pretty hard to visit.)  Let me tell you, there was a lot of English being spoken.  And then they read a  french book and translated it as they read.  I have two friends who are French Bulldogs and one who is a French Poodle.  They would be embarrassed to hear my Mom speaking this stuff.  I think she speaks with a Spanish accent.  French, indeed!

But they did have some fun with a question as to whether any of them were bored staying home in this shut-down.  And that made me think, was I bored?

Actually, I would have to answer that in a definitive negative.  Everytime I turn around, someone wants to go for a walk.  And Yours Truly is not one to refuse a walk.  Although sometimes I have to put the skids on when they don't let me choose the direction.  Dad is a creature of habit, and he thinks you have to go one of two paths:  the one around the rec center or the one up the mountain.  Now THAT can get boring.  Especially when he wants to do the same path in the afternoon as we did in the morning.  

Mom likes to explore like I do.  She puts me on auto pilot and I get to take her wherever I want to go.  That's how we found out how to get to one of Mom's friends walking instead of in the car.  Mom's friend and Mom were both surprised when we saw her out in her back yard.  I knew where I was going, so I wasn't the least bit surprised.  It was fun.

And when Mom's not paying attention, I always lead her by my favorite friends who have treats for me.  You know...as long as we're on a walk, a little treat wouldn't hurt!

Just a little while ago, I was out on the porch with Dad.  He's reading another book, and it's fun to just veg out there with him.  There was a nice breeze and lots and lots of smells floating by.  

This afternoon, Mom went out to weed the front yard, and she let me come help her.  I mostly kept the rabbits out of her way.  And I was constantly on the alert for my friend, Javelina.  I know Mom would prefer we run in the house when Javelina is around.  

So no, I'm not bored.  I'm pretty happy these days.  I do hope for everyone else's sake that the virus goes away soon.  

Hope you are happy and not bored, too.

Love, G   

Has COVID-19 Got You Down?

I certainly hope not, at least not in the literal sense.  I would be very sad if one of you had the virus and got really sick.  So please, wash your hands a lot and stay home.  And I have some tips for you while you're staying home.

First, I have a movie for you to watch:

Mom and I have been really busy the past week and a half.  We were commissioned to do a movie!  How do you like them carrots!  Didn't I tell you I was famous?  And now see, it landed me a real acting job.  It's just a bit piece that the principal of my old school wanted to use for his morning announcement.  See, all the kids are out of school, so they go online and this would be his way of starting the online lessons.

I'm not so sure about the end result of the movie.  Mom didn't really know what she was doing.  She would go to Google for a few minutes and look something up, then she would go to her ipad and try something out.  Usually, it took at least 3 trips to Google before she said, "Ahaaa!"  Which only meant that she figured out one of 3 millions issues she had while making my movie.  When she finally got it the way she wanted it, it then took her a day and a half to transfer it to Youtube.  I told her she needed to rent a teenager.  I gave her a C+ for the Movie, but she got a A+ for trying!

Anyway, we now have a 5 minute movie on Youtube all about me.  And you can see it for yourself.  It's right here:  The World According to Guinness - the Movie .  

(If you can't click on it to get to the movie, cut and paste this into your browser:  https://youtu.be/Y5scdQw99to )

In it, you will find lots of things you can do if you're bored.  Read, listen to music, play with your toys, take walks and smell the flowers, and roll around in the grass.  Besides that, here are some other fun things that I like to do:

You can do is dig holes to hide your bones.  I do it in the house.  Mom doesn't like me to dig in the yard.  But I hide my bones in a hole I dug in my doggie bed.  It's fun.  Try it.

How about trying whipped cream with nothing on it?  It's really yummy, I can tell you.

Or take a ride somewhere, anywhere.  
Just to see a new place, maybe.  Or 
just to put your head out the window and feel the air.

Or maybe try hiding one of your toys under a cupboard.  And then try and find it!

Or devour a new book.                                    But maybe not literally!

Or my favorite.  Just plunk yourself down in front of that TV you have in the front room of your house and watch the world go by.

See, you never have to be bored when you're at home.  Just be a little creative.

Hope you all stay home and stay healthy.

Love, G